Oh, and by the way...

Everyone, particularly Floss, needs to see I Love Huckabees. Jason Schwartzman! I went in there hoping for Max Fisher and, although this role is not Max and this movie is not Rushmore, it quite lived up to my high expectations. And, Floss, if you haven't yet, go see Garden State, too. Trust me. And Wes Anderson is coming out with a new film soon, too. And, yeah.

Hot Pot Night

Last night Nina, Kelly and I went to Chinese Culture Club's Hot Pot night at Unity House. It was a lot like I expect Beijing will be: noisy, crowded, confusing, and just a little bit sketchy. This being the case, I decided that the event would count as taking place in China, which meant that I suspended my vegetarianism for the evening. I didn't really have a choice. We were instructed to mix up a sauce from the components on the table. I used sesame oil, soy sauce, and peanut sauce. Then we went into a crowded room where about twenty people were crowded around a table with two hot pots of boiling water. Nina manouvred her way up to the front to secure food for the three of us. She tried to get only vegetables and tofu and stuff for me, but it was all cooked up together so it was hard to avoid meat altogether. I enjoyed everything except the taro and was particularly fond of the soft omelet-looking things that turned out to be bean curd. There were also some delicious chewy mushrooms and fried rice that was not much like the fried rice you normally get in Chinese restaurants here in the US. It had beef in it and I picked out all the visible bits and gave them to Nina but I still felt rather wicked and decadent.

Today Nina and Kelly, along with a few of our other friends, came over for a chai party, and Nina complained of a stomachache after our meal. I feel fine. So did Kelly. I worry sometimes about next year in China, and one of the things our textbook has warned me to be wary of is the many sources of gastrointestinal distress- which I would be able to describe rather evocatively in Mandarin. Maybe I'll bring a suitcase full of pop tarts.

Hulk will smash.

I went through a blue hair phase, I'll admit it. I wasn't trying to make a statement, I wasn't trying to annoy my parents or any other authority figures, I wasn't rebelling or copying anyone in particular. I just thought blue was a pretty color, and when I had blue hair I felt about 75% more outgoing and confident than I did otherwise. I also had a great many blue clothes and personal items, because I just liked the color blue that much.

And then I got sick of it.

Now I like the color brown, and pink, and red, and certain shades of orange, and until today, my new favorite might have been green, but today green was knocked to the bottom of the list, down there with yellow ochre. Today in painting I painted green.

The still life I am painting is an Incredible Hulk glove on top of a green bucket next to a bottle of Comet dish soap, sitting on a backdrop of Astroturf. My painting is 18"x20" and I think I've used up half the tube of green paint JUST TODAY. I'm still seeing green before my eyes. I wanted to paint a different still life, one with a variety of brown bottles and a purple dropcloth, but there was no room. I managed to lug my enormous easel over to that side of the room, only to find that I was blocking someone's view. "Just a little to the left..." she said. "No, just a little more... okay, thanks!"
"I can't see at all," said another girl, but I thought she said "I can see it all," so I said, "Are you sure?"
"Yes, I'm sure, you're completely blocking my view!" she said angrily. So I pulled my easel back across the room- losing a wheel in the process- to the only spot still available: behind four other people, eighteen feet away from the Hulk still life- dainty and glamorous.

This Modern World

Jay,
I'm trying to work on my major proposal, but I don't really know where to begin. Is there any way I could look at previous students' proposals?
Thanks,
Emily

Yes. Ask Shyvonne Shaw to share hers with you.
J

Shyvonne,
Hi. I'm trying to design a logic major and I was wondering if I could see your proposal? I'm not too clear on what they're looking for.
Thanks a lot,
Emily

Groupwise: the email that you sent to sshaw@smith.edu was deleted unread, as though you were a vile spammer not worthy of assistance.

Now what?


Today I was doing Chinese at the breakfast table, as I always do, when one of the supplementary vocab items caught my eye:
to eat tofu, to flirt (Taiwan).
This morning in class, we recited the dialogues from the book. Nina's went like this:
Li: Wang Hua, do you know how to make Mapo tofu? I love to eat tofu.
Wang: Be careful, or I will hit you!
Li: That is not what I meant.
Wang: What did you mean?
Li: I am sick of eating dorm food... etc.
While Nina and Kelsey were reading this, the native speakers were all giggling. I giggled too, pleased to be in on the joke, since I was clearly the only lao wai (foreigner) who got it. Li laoshi, our professor, said "Do you understand the meaning?"
I said, in Chinese, "Yes! It has two meanings: to eat bean curd and to flirt."
The native speakers giggled even harder.
Li laoshi shook his head. "No, it has two meanings, you are right. But second meaning is not flirt, it is take advantage, man take advantage of woman. Any man says this to you in China, you should hit him. HA!"
As it turns out, only Taiwanese people will get this joke, so I should be okay in Beijing. Not that I needed something else to worry about after the chapter on what happens if you drink the water!

A bit of a rant

Today the annoying girl in my math class clapped because we were learning base 2 notation. She actually applauded. What the heck? I love my classes but I don't clap when I hear the word "semantics." It's just odd. There's a girl in my house who apparently lies on the floor for all her classes, and once Peter Gregory tripped over her. What is wrong with these people? This is not how we behave in a classroom for goodness' sake!

Here are some options:

Courses:

Design I

Reading Chinese Texts

Reading Chinese Texts

Computational Linguistics

Symbolic Logic

Computer Science I

Mathematical Structures

Number Theory Wittgenstein

Meaning & Truth

Sculpture I

Drawing II

Mary

Technology of Reading & Writing

Philosophical Novels

Freud & Sherlock Holmes

Imagining Language

Child Development

Multicultural Education

Intro to Chinese Linguistics (Umass)

Intro to Semantics (Umass)

Modal Logic (Umass)

Philosophy of Language (Umass)

Philosophy and Logic (Umass)

Endangered Language (Hampshire)

Philosophy of Mind (Hampshire)

Puzzles and Paradoxes (Hampshire)

I thought I was all set until I took a look at the 5 College course listings. Now I'm back to square one. For all the snarky comments people make about UMass, they have some really neat courses. It breaks my heart that I can take, at the absolute most, twenty of them and more likely between 16 and 18- I don't especially want to take five classes every semester- that would be a bit insane, and considering the list of UMass and Hampshire classes, I'd be spending a lot of time on the bus. I may have to get a car.

New Life Plan

Oh, my god, I want to go here. That would require a whole lot more arrows on the Life Plan flow chart, but Scott McCloud is teaching! And Will Eisner! And Art Speigleman! And, you know, Scott McCloud!
I don't have time for this sort of thing- where would I find time? What part of the life plan is flexible? Clearly, none of it.

Happy Declare My Major Day!

I had hoped to be a Logic major by sunset, but as it turns out, it's not that simple. Yesterday afternoon after testing some kindergardeners at the campus school I went to Jay Garfield's office to ask him to be my advisor. But declaring a major in Logic is not like declaring a major in English or Biology- there is no major in Logic; I must design my own.
What this means is that I have to write a proposal explaining why I want to be a Logic major and why no existing major will do; I have to make a list of all the courses I plan to take for the rest of my time at Smith and explain how each one relates to my Master Plan; I have to have two advisors, instead of one, get about five signatures from various people- Jim Henle has to sign twice- the Philosophy department, Math department, and Curriculum Committee have to read my proposal and vote on it... then, and only then, will I be a Logic Major.
Choosing all my classes for the rest of my time at Smith is stressful, if not impossible. What if one day I wake up with a consuming desire to learn Russian? And how do I know what courses are even going to be offered my senior year, and, almost as importantly, which ones will be taught by the incompetant M-rrie B-rgman? It's also frightening and depressing to realize that I only have four semesters left, not counting the spring of my Junior year, when I plan to be in China. In my distressed state, I felt compelled to make a flow chart of my academic career and subsequent adult life.
"Welcome aboard," Jay said to me. But it'll be awhile before we sail this ship along.

Fall Breaking

Today I had pancakes and hot chocolate for breakfast, lounged in Jess's room looking at pictures of Seattle, went downtown with Leah and Stina and smelled nice-smelling things, and generally lazed around. It was warm out and the leaves are changing, but not yet falling.
Here are some of the scents you can get at Essentials:

• grass
• wet garden
• ocean
• thunderstorm
• laundromat
• dirt
• mango
• tomato
• condensed milk
• rain
• mulled cider
• martini
• ginger ale
• string bean
• basil
  

You wouldn't think a bottle of the smell of dirt would smell nearly as nice as it does. Still, I don't know that I would want it for a perfume- it really does smell like dirt.

Tomorrow we're off to Manchester for our fall break adventure. Yesterday Leah was giving a tour to some people from New Hampshire and she mentioned that we were planning to visit Manchester.
"Why?"
"Just... you know. For fun."
"Oh. Well... I guess you can make your own fun."

Fortunately we never seem to have trouble with that.

P.S.- Mad props to my dad, who is totally running the Chicago Marathon this weekend. As for me, I'm gonna walk before they make me run.

Things It's Okay to Say After Taking a Test:

• To your classmate: It was okay.
• To a casual acquaintaince: It wasn't too bad.
• To the professor: It went all right, I think.
• To a friend: I actually think I did well.
• To your parents or weblog readers ONLY: I aced it like it was my job.

In other news, I went to the Nonotuck school today to play with the haizi. Good times were had. My favorite bit was when Nathaniel and Hazel explained to me, apropos of our game of House, what constitutes a family: "Some houses have a mom and a dad and some houses have two dads and some houses have two moms." "Yeah and some houses have just one mom or just one dad." "Yeah."

I love Northampton.

I dunno, though. I'm not crazy about the way the grownups at Nonotuck speak to the children, with a funny tone of voice and calling everybody "friend" like a bunch of Quakers: "Hey now, at Nonotuck we don't put toys on the climber because then when friends want to play they won't be able to" etc. Also, at Nonotuck we don't use weapons- no guns, no swords. I'm not a fan of that. I used to be, but now I'm not so sure- not even being allowed to pretend a stick is a sword seems harsh and misguided and reminicent of some sort of Thought-Police. You can't be Inigo Montoya or a knight of the Round Table without a sword. Police officers, alien invaders, soldiers, and cowboys all have guns. What about making a bow and arrow out of two sticks and a piece of string? I'm not saying I'm an advocate of shiny, realistic-looking plastic Uzis or bloody violent video games- I'm not. But not being allowed to pretend something is something else... that's just so repressive. Children need a chance to slay their dragons.

The System

On the upper left hand corner of my desk is a pile of tasks to be completed in the near future. When I finish something, e.g. a linguistics reading, the linguistics notebook goes in my bag and the textbook goes on the shelf to my right. At the moment I have the following items on my desk:
-A paper on child logic to be read by 4:00 this afternoon for my meeting with Jill;
-My math folder, notebook, and textbook, to be used for studying for Friday's midterm;
-My Chinese book, containing 45 new vocabulary words to make flashcards for and learn by tomorrow;
-My linguistics notebook and selected readings, to be studied for Friday's OTHER midterm.
-Not represented: the two canvases that must be stretched and primed for tomorrow's painting class. Looks like another 7 hour day at Amherst tomorrow.


All of this work may turn out to be in vain because I very well might be going to prison. I am going to kill- or at least smack- the Horribly Annoying Girl in my math class, appropriately named Jillian. Jillian is a firstyear but, like all reasonably intelligent people, has already taken Calculus and already understands everything we do in Discrete Math long before we actually do it. She has not yet mastered the basic grade-school etiquite of not looking at others' quiz scores and not remarking loudly, "The homework last night was so easy- it took me like 20 minutes."
The other day as we were packing up she said to me, "Oh, functions! I guess this is the part of the course where it gets really hard for you, since you've never taken precalc."

As she should know, from looking at my papers, it's already quite hard enough for me, thank you.

I am so going to jail. Soon.